It's Kampung Story Time
I still feel so tired, so dragged from Saturday up till today. I rushed back to my kampung for Lynda's wedding, God, life is not easy when somebody was expecting for u and then u were damn late, and after the wedding, u could not start ur car's engine because batteries were dead; as a conjunction of your own stupidity, didnt off the lights because when u were on the way to the wedding place, it was raining heavily and u just had to on the lights. No doubt, that was what happened to me on Saturday, and somehow I just felt to sleep in the car while waiting for my dad to fetch me.
And when i reached home, i had to prepare my ears for another sad story of my grandmom. My mom, as usual, being the ratu air mata in the family, was crying advising me not to do any shit that would embarass this family, because my dad's family doesnt like us and always want to see us down. God, what it has got to do with me? Just because im not married yet, or even engaged yet?
Frankly speaking, i dont give a damn to my dad's family side anymore coz im just tired of their bullshit behaviour. I have no respect left in me for all the makciks and pakciks, not because being influenced by my mom, but because i think they dont deserve to be respected anymore. But of course, being a child of a family whom teaches me to be rational, showing off angriness and how i dont like them are just lowing down our reputation. So we just keep it that way, still visting them during hari raya, and put aside a thought of that they might say something about our family. We just, DON'T CARE!!
I recorded lotta things when i was in kampung, and i thought of jotting down everything here. The other thing that really touched me, when i saw my dad's office next to my house. The office i used to be in there and played the computer. The office where i entered silently just to talk to my boyfriend using the phone in there. The office which recorded all the statements i told my dad about my past life. The office from where i used to chat like hell with my chat friends. And when i came back last raya, i saw the office has no life anymore, i went inside and it was so dusty, so dirty, nothing inside, like being left for quite a long time. With bundles of files, books etc etc..God i really felt like crying and hugging my dad, while saying, thank u for bringing me up from all these!!
Im more sure that it is not because of the rezeki, or tak ada rezeki, it is just that my dad is old and he has no strength again to run the business. And he told me that it is difficult to run a cafeteria, instead of served food, and because of this IPT system which they have changed from served food to cafeteria, so that the students will have variety of choices in food. He said, nobody can take care of the flow cash, i cant be there all the time to take care of the cafe. My brother has other responsibilities coz he has to take care of the family who are all in KL.
I heard some of my dad's former workers mostly are still in kampung, doing kampung job, even Kamal cooks nasi lemak and sends it off to the restaurants. Even my brother, he is still jobless till now, struggling for job and hunting for tenders at the age of 39. He's turning 40 next year and still run here and there for job.
I dont blame him at all. In fact, when my dad gave him some cash for his expense, i felt so damn sad inside. He's desperate, he has family to take care of. Me, even if im broke like hell, i can always think of something without borthering my dad. I can always borrow from friends, or i can always sell my things, no theres nothing to feel ashamed of, because im single, ive no responsibilities and ive no burden in me. But my brother? With two growing-up daughters, and a wife who always wants to wear branded stuff, no , its really a difficult condition for him.
I just pray that God leads him way, and he'll find a better job as soon as possible. Ive helped him with one post here, but i dont know whats happening with the application, im just scared that they find out he's overqualified for the post. Well, for me, in resume, he has nothing lack. Everything seems so perfect, with Masters as his highest qualification. He has a very command of English, come on, he studied in Australia for almost 3 years, and he's capable in understanding almost every field. Why cant he find himself a good job? I doubt if that really happens.
Above all, all the best for Azmi! - delly
Monday, November 28, 2005
Friday, November 25, 2005
Oh Life!
I heard from Linda that her journalists get connected and share their stories thru blogs. Man, why did i know only today? I'm a writer in nature and of course i love to hear people pointing and voicing out their opinions. I just emailed Faiza* quickly, and so impressively, he came step in my place and gave me a piece of paper fully written with these gen-y's blogs. Hey dude, we come into the office, start writing about people, sometimes without any reasons just have to stayback in the office just because of other people, so why not writing about yourself?
Ha..ha..ha...gosh, we were all born with one objective in life: to write.
So i just glanced through one by one blog, some are good in expressing themselves with English, some are terrific with their Malay. It hardly matters in whatever medium u r writing, as long as people do understand, and first and foremost, of course to make YOU, YOURSELF understand.
In daily life, ive been seeing these young journalists being so committed with their work, assignments etc...and i definitely agree that actually it is not easy to be here, i mean in this media industry. Like i what wrote before, you have actually to think and focus on what other people like, how they become like that and have to convince your readers why ur magazine should be read, what makes ur magazine different from other publications? Man, it is not easy. U just have to live and breathe the air surround you before other people do, and you have to look at things beyond other people's imagination.
Well, we are known here as GEN Y- UNLIMITED IMAGINATION. What do u expect?
Im impressed of these young gals and guys (most of them are younger than me) and hope they are able to deliver the best in them. Well haji wont be this kaya raya without us, dude! - delly
I heard from Linda that her journalists get connected and share their stories thru blogs. Man, why did i know only today? I'm a writer in nature and of course i love to hear people pointing and voicing out their opinions. I just emailed Faiza* quickly, and so impressively, he came step in my place and gave me a piece of paper fully written with these gen-y's blogs. Hey dude, we come into the office, start writing about people, sometimes without any reasons just have to stayback in the office just because of other people, so why not writing about yourself?
Ha..ha..ha...gosh, we were all born with one objective in life: to write.
So i just glanced through one by one blog, some are good in expressing themselves with English, some are terrific with their Malay. It hardly matters in whatever medium u r writing, as long as people do understand, and first and foremost, of course to make YOU, YOURSELF understand.
In daily life, ive been seeing these young journalists being so committed with their work, assignments etc...and i definitely agree that actually it is not easy to be here, i mean in this media industry. Like i what wrote before, you have actually to think and focus on what other people like, how they become like that and have to convince your readers why ur magazine should be read, what makes ur magazine different from other publications? Man, it is not easy. U just have to live and breathe the air surround you before other people do, and you have to look at things beyond other people's imagination.
Well, we are known here as GEN Y- UNLIMITED IMAGINATION. What do u expect?
Im impressed of these young gals and guys (most of them are younger than me) and hope they are able to deliver the best in them. Well haji wont be this kaya raya without us, dude! - delly
Finally....
After one month, finally Samsung's agent called me with a kinda bright news...they are going to deliver my SGHD600 soon, maybe next week. Lagi lagi may be. And this happened too because i wrote an email direct to samsung mobile's website. Barulah terhegeh-hegeh nak ngecall. Well it is very well understood that i was just among the lucky winners kan, but as u've announced that i WON the phone, is it wrong for me to put hope?
Other than that, just feel happy coz another friend of mine is getting married tomorrow, ive to rush to go back to my kampung just for her tomorrow. Sorang, sorang dah kawin ni, camana? ;) - delly
After one month, finally Samsung's agent called me with a kinda bright news...they are going to deliver my SGHD600 soon, maybe next week. Lagi lagi may be. And this happened too because i wrote an email direct to samsung mobile's website. Barulah terhegeh-hegeh nak ngecall. Well it is very well understood that i was just among the lucky winners kan, but as u've announced that i WON the phone, is it wrong for me to put hope?
Other than that, just feel happy coz another friend of mine is getting married tomorrow, ive to rush to go back to my kampung just for her tomorrow. Sorang, sorang dah kawin ni, camana? ;) - delly
Friday, November 18, 2005
The Ring
I never expected that it would happen this soon, but yea, it did happen, and he got me surprised with his white gold proposal yesterday! Thank God, i just shed a tear for the moment, i thank God that he makes me realize how he loves me so much, and how i should be grateful for the sincerity in him.
He hugged me passionately before placing the box right inside my pant's backside pocket. I thought i knew what was inside but i gave him a big hug first for that, then everything turned out to be my scream and cry of joy. God, I love him so much. Please let me live my life in this love...
Just a simple white gold ring, but i feel like being covered with diamonds all over. G, most of the times makes me really mad, but he causes the bitter and hes the one who put effort to make it sweet. I love u baby.... - delly
I never expected that it would happen this soon, but yea, it did happen, and he got me surprised with his white gold proposal yesterday! Thank God, i just shed a tear for the moment, i thank God that he makes me realize how he loves me so much, and how i should be grateful for the sincerity in him.
He hugged me passionately before placing the box right inside my pant's backside pocket. I thought i knew what was inside but i gave him a big hug first for that, then everything turned out to be my scream and cry of joy. God, I love him so much. Please let me live my life in this love...
Just a simple white gold ring, but i feel like being covered with diamonds all over. G, most of the times makes me really mad, but he causes the bitter and hes the one who put effort to make it sweet. I love u baby.... - delly
Thursday, November 17, 2005
When It Is Time To Evaluate Yourself...
Everybody in my company is waiting for January 2006 to come, as new salary scheme will be introduced. Entah ye ye, but i found out the truth today, as we the editors were called to a brief course which is called 'PAPO' Performance Appraisal Online. Of course, talking about work, job specs, semua nak yang terbaik. Dan kenalah promote diri sendiri habis-habisan. And this task always put me in between; between the truth and sincerity dengan 'nak jaga hati'. Under me, Im consulting three journalists whom characteristically different from each other, and im sure they'll be gosipping with each other after finding out that ive evaluated them differently, according to my point of view.
Wholly, just wanna describe them one by one. Let me start with the youngest among us, shes the youngest, the most stubborn, but at the same time the most hardworking gal. A single order will be responsed in less that a minute. Thats what i like much about her. But, on the other side, shes rude sometimes, practically i dont feel like being her boss, because it seems to me that she tries to prove im not supposed to be at my position. but she just doing her work fine. Ive no complaint about that.
Id*, so womanly gal, getting married real soon, so shes so much disturbed with the preparation of the wedding, i guess so ;). She has impressed me with her work too, but i have to say, she can give advise to kids, can consult kids damn well, but cant be a good kids writer. Because she loves to write so long long paragraph, with a combination of confusing sentences, i must say. But she is as hardworking as An* does, thank God, she has helped me a lot in building and completing this magazine evry month.
The bittersweet, CK is kinda different. At first she impressed me so well with her writing, I was amazed of her capabilities to write some scripts for Damia series, i heard song lyrics too, and some other creative stuff. But after a few months (specifically after several issues), she started to make simple mistake like spelling errors, and wrong conjuction etc etc. Most of her articles look 'cincai' to me, and sometimes made me really mad. Shes always the last to submit her work, every month, and always has reason for every single thing i commented. Very nice lady (lady?) but because of our same age, she just (maybe la kot) thinks that, lets take easy everything she says. I guess so.
Above all, im just so proud of my team. For me, my team rocks! We are the best because im the best editor ha ha i dont mind whatever they wanna do, with or without me, as long as they complete their work. Im grateful as the graphic designer is creative, in fact more creative than i do, and it helps me so much in improving this cute mag.
Well a good news to everybody, my mag has been revamped, we'll come out with a new look this coming JANUARY 2006. Just cant wait!! And guess what? A brand new look on cover and a new PRICE. Im so relaxed when they finally announced of the amendment of the price, because rm 3.90 for students aged 9-14 sounds so illogical. RM 3.00 is cool, as we have damn variety of infos! And the it has been resized too, it is BK size now, and everybody starts promoting that we are into BK now. The hell with that, coz just like what i wrote before, i dont give a f*c* to this girly mag. Sorry! - baby_delly
Everybody in my company is waiting for January 2006 to come, as new salary scheme will be introduced. Entah ye ye, but i found out the truth today, as we the editors were called to a brief course which is called 'PAPO' Performance Appraisal Online. Of course, talking about work, job specs, semua nak yang terbaik. Dan kenalah promote diri sendiri habis-habisan. And this task always put me in between; between the truth and sincerity dengan 'nak jaga hati'. Under me, Im consulting three journalists whom characteristically different from each other, and im sure they'll be gosipping with each other after finding out that ive evaluated them differently, according to my point of view.
Wholly, just wanna describe them one by one. Let me start with the youngest among us, shes the youngest, the most stubborn, but at the same time the most hardworking gal. A single order will be responsed in less that a minute. Thats what i like much about her. But, on the other side, shes rude sometimes, practically i dont feel like being her boss, because it seems to me that she tries to prove im not supposed to be at my position. but she just doing her work fine. Ive no complaint about that.
Id*, so womanly gal, getting married real soon, so shes so much disturbed with the preparation of the wedding, i guess so ;). She has impressed me with her work too, but i have to say, she can give advise to kids, can consult kids damn well, but cant be a good kids writer. Because she loves to write so long long paragraph, with a combination of confusing sentences, i must say. But she is as hardworking as An* does, thank God, she has helped me a lot in building and completing this magazine evry month.
The bittersweet, CK is kinda different. At first she impressed me so well with her writing, I was amazed of her capabilities to write some scripts for Damia series, i heard song lyrics too, and some other creative stuff. But after a few months (specifically after several issues), she started to make simple mistake like spelling errors, and wrong conjuction etc etc. Most of her articles look 'cincai' to me, and sometimes made me really mad. Shes always the last to submit her work, every month, and always has reason for every single thing i commented. Very nice lady (lady?) but because of our same age, she just (maybe la kot) thinks that, lets take easy everything she says. I guess so.
Above all, im just so proud of my team. For me, my team rocks! We are the best because im the best editor ha ha i dont mind whatever they wanna do, with or without me, as long as they complete their work. Im grateful as the graphic designer is creative, in fact more creative than i do, and it helps me so much in improving this cute mag.
Well a good news to everybody, my mag has been revamped, we'll come out with a new look this coming JANUARY 2006. Just cant wait!! And guess what? A brand new look on cover and a new PRICE. Im so relaxed when they finally announced of the amendment of the price, because rm 3.90 for students aged 9-14 sounds so illogical. RM 3.00 is cool, as we have damn variety of infos! And the it has been resized too, it is BK size now, and everybody starts promoting that we are into BK now. The hell with that, coz just like what i wrote before, i dont give a f*c* to this girly mag. Sorry! - baby_delly
Tuesday, November 15, 2005
To Work Under Pressure
That's how working in media is. If you have crossed the deadline, you'll be dead. I don't really care if they shoot or stab me, but killing me with bunches of questions makes the pain feels even more bitter. Apai started to call me again and again, for the confirmaton, he called me to his room to, as if my magazine was the only magazine that met the deadline after the date given. Pleaselah! If i can do more work (read: if i can design the layouts and crop the pix), i'm sure i will. Aku ada dua tangan dengan dua kaki je, and i've forced my graphic to her limit, she just couldnt do anything for more.
But i think im lucky because i can really depend on my journalists, as good as i am, they are able to work under pressure too, no matter how much pressure, and to whatever extent, still we can deliver the best.
Even though i crossed the line, i must admit that i just cant wait to see the output coz of three reasons. One, December issue is in PINK in color. Second, because Suz*e is on the cover, and she looks so lovely and professional. Moreover i took the pix, and i feel damn good of my own good work. :) And thirdly, this is the very last issue of E-Baca in this size. After 11 eleven issues, the 12th ones will come out with a brand new size, BIGGER and LOVELIER. And im sure we can definitely meet the deadlines in future coz we'll be having only 4 sections (as Apai told me) and lesser pages.
I dont care whatever changes that are going to take place, my readers will always the number one subject to be considered. I dont really enjoy doing and editing boys' magazine, which is definitely opposite me, coz i was born a lady, i love to write on women's issues and i used to write on their matters. but trying something new is not a bad idea either, to gain esperience, is to accept anything which acrosses my life. That was how i started my belief, and i guess, i was not wrong. in fact, it was the best decision taken. - delly_baby
That's how working in media is. If you have crossed the deadline, you'll be dead. I don't really care if they shoot or stab me, but killing me with bunches of questions makes the pain feels even more bitter. Apai started to call me again and again, for the confirmaton, he called me to his room to, as if my magazine was the only magazine that met the deadline after the date given. Pleaselah! If i can do more work (read: if i can design the layouts and crop the pix), i'm sure i will. Aku ada dua tangan dengan dua kaki je, and i've forced my graphic to her limit, she just couldnt do anything for more.
But i think im lucky because i can really depend on my journalists, as good as i am, they are able to work under pressure too, no matter how much pressure, and to whatever extent, still we can deliver the best.
Even though i crossed the line, i must admit that i just cant wait to see the output coz of three reasons. One, December issue is in PINK in color. Second, because Suz*e is on the cover, and she looks so lovely and professional. Moreover i took the pix, and i feel damn good of my own good work. :) And thirdly, this is the very last issue of E-Baca in this size. After 11 eleven issues, the 12th ones will come out with a brand new size, BIGGER and LOVELIER. And im sure we can definitely meet the deadlines in future coz we'll be having only 4 sections (as Apai told me) and lesser pages.
I dont care whatever changes that are going to take place, my readers will always the number one subject to be considered. I dont really enjoy doing and editing boys' magazine, which is definitely opposite me, coz i was born a lady, i love to write on women's issues and i used to write on their matters. but trying something new is not a bad idea either, to gain esperience, is to accept anything which acrosses my life. That was how i started my belief, and i guess, i was not wrong. in fact, it was the best decision taken. - delly_baby
Thursday, November 10, 2005
Wednesday, November 09, 2005
Satu Hari Di Hari Raya
Back to work again, after spending 5 days in my hometown. It was not the 'raya' that i was eager waiting for, but the moment to get together with the whole family, especially my sister from Langkawi and her 4 kids. Unfortunately, my brother could not join us on that special day coz as what i was told, his daughter was just recovered from a serious hot fever.
I was trying not to say anything, because i just know his tight condition, and didnt want to bring it as an issue in the family. I was the one who sms-ed him because in the first day of raya, we were waiting for him, as usual he should supposed to reach home by 3 pm. But i didnt even see his shadow at 6 pm, and started to sms him.
My mom was angry when i asked her to call him, because according to her, a son or a daughter should always get connected to family, which i 100 percent agreed. But considerng my brother's situation, im trying to put my feet on his shoes, and really, it hurts, when you have to go back to your hometown, when u r a jobless, while the wife is earning well.
This is what i feel happening to him. Because in my kampung, everybody knows that he used to work with my dad, and when my dad didnt get any chances to continue all the tenders, he turned to be unemployed. And that was so bad for a man who is married, with two growing daughters.
Really, i just wanted to feel pity for him.
I just dont know why, but i did not really enjoy this syawal. I went to Lynda's house, and we were busy talking about the preparation of her wedding day. Last day before went back to my hometown, i was busy discussing the same hell thing with Azn**. What the hell, everybody was busy talking about their big day, and me, im still not certain whether this man wants to marry me or not...pity me...
Anyways, being so grateful as a human...i should be happy that i am myself... - delly
Back to work again, after spending 5 days in my hometown. It was not the 'raya' that i was eager waiting for, but the moment to get together with the whole family, especially my sister from Langkawi and her 4 kids. Unfortunately, my brother could not join us on that special day coz as what i was told, his daughter was just recovered from a serious hot fever.
I was trying not to say anything, because i just know his tight condition, and didnt want to bring it as an issue in the family. I was the one who sms-ed him because in the first day of raya, we were waiting for him, as usual he should supposed to reach home by 3 pm. But i didnt even see his shadow at 6 pm, and started to sms him.
My mom was angry when i asked her to call him, because according to her, a son or a daughter should always get connected to family, which i 100 percent agreed. But considerng my brother's situation, im trying to put my feet on his shoes, and really, it hurts, when you have to go back to your hometown, when u r a jobless, while the wife is earning well.
This is what i feel happening to him. Because in my kampung, everybody knows that he used to work with my dad, and when my dad didnt get any chances to continue all the tenders, he turned to be unemployed. And that was so bad for a man who is married, with two growing daughters.
Really, i just wanted to feel pity for him.
I just dont know why, but i did not really enjoy this syawal. I went to Lynda's house, and we were busy talking about the preparation of her wedding day. Last day before went back to my hometown, i was busy discussing the same hell thing with Azn**. What the hell, everybody was busy talking about their big day, and me, im still not certain whether this man wants to marry me or not...pity me...
Anyways, being so grateful as a human...i should be happy that i am myself... - delly
