My Cinderella Story

This sunday will be a different day for me. And for those people who are going to see me. I finally been successfully poisoned by my colleagues to fit in this stupid dress, because of the costume night we are having.

Here's the Cinderella's dress, Aznor has borrowed me her digital camera for me to take more pix of myself that day. - delly

Transkripsi Delly

Biarlah Rahsia....

Pernahkah kau bermimpi seketika
berada di tempatku
membayangkan
pahit manis berlalu
entah siapa yang tahu

Mungkin nanti kau jua merasakan
berdepan dengan kata menyesakkan
takkan tugumu kebal
tiada pertimbangan

Keheningan malam membangunkan
kepayahan jiwa meluahkan
andai kau jujur memahami
tiadaku menjauhi

Dan kisahku yang masih panjang
menambahkan berat yang memandang
lantas ku pendam
kuputuskan
biarlah rahsia...

Semakin aku hidup dalam cinta
tiada kuasa mampu menghalangnya
hentikan kata-kata bertulangkan dusta

pernahkah kau bermimpi seketika
berada di tempatku....

haaahhhh.....

Mendengar album terbaru Siti Nurhaliza, Transkripsi, memang tiada bezanya dengan album-album sebelumnya. Lebih ke'Indo'nan dan ke'Melly Goeslow'an, lagu-lagu Melly memang sebijik style dialah, cumanya dengan suara Siti. Bayangkan ajelah lagu Jika atau Ada Apa Dengan Cinta dinyanyikan oleh Siti. Begitulah didendangkan...

Macamana pun, aku suka dengan Siti Situ Sana Sini, rasanya mengikut taste aku yang suka dengan fast creative song dicampur dengan elemen hip hop, plus, plus pop sikit. Keduanya, biarlah bunyi Indon, aku tetap suka...Biarlah Rahsia...bukanlah kerana lagu sangat, tetapi kerana lirik yang ditulis oleh Siti. Memang sangat menusuk kalbu aku yang pernah merasa kepedihan bercinta a.k.a cinta terlarang. :(

Banyak kisah dalam hidup aku yang tidak pernah terjangkau oleh fikiran sesiapa pun. Seperti Siti jugak, aku memutuskan agar segalanya..biarlah rahsia...kecuali beberapa teman rapat yang sangat memahami. Aku mengimpikan sangat agar ada seseorang yang sangat memahami keadaan diri aku, atau setidak-tidaknya menjadi aku walaupun sehari agar mereka faham siapa aku yang sebenarnya... - delly

The Course Day

I'm attending one-whole-day-course - regarding the branding and promotion. Rebranding. Whatsoeva. Today I got to know that my rival's magazine was the most selling magazine in the book fair last few weeks. And mine is at the 22nd place, not so bad as to be listed among 34 magazines.

Sometimes I do think of quitting and retiring. Ahh....everything makes me mad. Is it about the concept? Or is it because we didn't find, as yet, the 'x' factor like B*K did? We already did almost everything just like other magazines do. We are almost 2 years old, and still crawling, looking for attention. That's too bad... At this point, somehow I feel that we are at our worst part - when we seem desperate to go downtown to fields and promote the magazines ourselves. What is lack inside? What is so damn empty inside?

Well life seems not easy for me, still not very easy. And it is just my bad luck that I have to handle a magazine which has no x factor. But there are still so many other factors I can use...including...not to be quitting now...face the facts....make it happens...(not 'makelovehappens'...that's bu**sh*t...... - delly

Autograph Session

Funny to know that we are idols of kids! Whereever me and my team go, they always ready with pen and our E-Baca in hand, and ask for a signature. Hwa.....u want my signature aaaa....kelakar je....anyways, thank you for the kids because they really support us, from the very beginning to the very end. We are now actively progress in sampling activities, twice in a week, involving 4 schools in a week. We have sampled the mag to 6 schools about now, and what makes us happy is that - we can give sample and sell as well! Thanks to abang Zack, thanks to abang Halim, and thanks to the always 'poyo' guy at the back, Khairul who are always willing to help. Guess they know the condition and status of our magazine, ha.ha..ha...and I really appreciate that.

Naqi*ah came over today and passed the report to me. Well, I feel proud too that they did mention my name on the report, and I'm more happy to know that their lecturers were happy with the presentation and regarded their small show as "a brilliant presentation".

That was really cool. They just reminded me back to my uni days, when I was really among the smart students and how I was proud to be in journalism sequence. I always led, and be the best in my every presentation (even though that time our modal for presentation were just 'kertas mahjung', marker pen, and the best we could do pun with the help of MS Power Point. That was considered the most canggihlah!). My soul was truly into writing, I had my neverending passion towards whatever I did, and I remember how the Head of Journalism used to like me so much - fevret studentlah!

These five students, Naqiah, Diyana, Safrena, Diana II and a the only thorn among roses, Ilah, were cool and they really paid attention to whatever I conveyed to them. Having no transportation at all, they rented car for about 4-5 times only to come to my office and see me. One day, they didn't sleep coz were eager waiting for the printing process of March's issue. They called me at 3.00 a.m just to tell me that they are awake and I should not hesitate to call them anytime to the printing factory. The factory people finally called me at about 7 am, and when I saw them in office, every face looked so pale and sleepy like hell. They showed up to every assignment I assigned to my journalists, and in return, I asked them to come over to any movie previews in Mid Valley.

On the Sk8 Challenge day, I was so damn busy that I didn't have time to plan them for any task, and finally I decided that they should follow Kareno to my uncle's place in Bangi to pick up food. It did them good too coz with Kareno they learned something about promotion and marketing etc etc.

On their presentation day, I just gave them whatever they wanted. And in evening when they came to return things, they handed me over with a VCD about them, that they recorded themselves, their pix and lotta Dunkin Donuts for us. Thank you so much! As I watched the movie, I felt so touchy inside because I finally realized that I didn't really concentrate on them much, because of my 'business'. However I just did whatever I could possibly do at that time. And when they were rewarded as "brilliang preenters", I felt happy inside too.

Tulah secebis kisah bebudak universiti yang baru nak belajar..... - delly

Something Cool About "High School Musical"

I went to The Ascott yesterday with Karen*o for a preview screening of "High School Musical", as invited by Janet and Michelle of Weber Shandwick. It will be on Astro in June, and for me the movie, which is originally produced by Disney Channel, is cool and definitely my type. But since it is a musical movie, so everything seems to be connected with songs and singing scenes, as in the Hindi and Tamil movies..ha..ha...but it was cool, the session was like..wow!..it was held in The Ascott's room I'm telling you...besides us, there were some other journalists from Cool Zone, Hot mag, etc etc etc....

Earlier that morning, me and my team were in section 6 and 9 schools (last week we were at sec 18 and 24 schools), and this time we brought magazines to sell them ourselves. Ha..hebat tak hebat...I've been thinking of better ideas every single day..and what's wrong in selling our very own product? And this is what we actually call - direct-to-the-customer-business-system..whatsoeva. And to our surprise the kids actually "know" what is best for them, and I don't have to wonder why they could easily handed me RM 10 just like that - school children are very advanced nowadays...if my time, I brought like RM 0.50 to school, and even it was a real joy coz it was such a big amount that time! But now, RM 10 is nothing, and a few kids told me that they actually wanted to buy two mags. So, what's up? It's mind poisoning time....grrr.....

Dawn invited us for the screening of Failure To Launch..ahh!! my type of movie..but I guess I won't be able to meet her up for the screening as we are on for another sampling session in another 2 schools! And this is what I always tell my team that, to gain the best, is to work till the end. And for that, guess I have to sacrifice some of entertainment elements that I really enjoy..maybe laters....

G bought me three DVDs - The Shaggy Dog, Ultra Violet and Yours, Mine and Ours. I've watched The Shaggy and Yours, Mine and Ours - but G told me Ultra Violet sucks. Oh God...futuristic movie is definitely not my type, and for that statement - thanks but no thanks - won't really have time to watch.

Oh yes, last Saturday I was in Zou*k, attended Sheena's invitation of MTV-Asia Voting Party - I got a chance to "eyes-to-eyes" dengan Adam (Tak Tahu), Ahli Fiqir, Zain Ruffedge and Joe Flizzow of Too Phat. I was disappointed as Too Phat and Ruffedge didn't perform, but it was cool too with the other two artistes' performance. . Thought of extending the party of my own and G after 11, but it was "electric" night - again!! - (hey what the heck of this Zou*k..asyik-asyik electric nite je!) - so as soon as the voting party over, we just left.

Till then, latersss...... - delly

My Dinner Gown (Kwang..kwang....!!)

I never had any dreams to look gorgeous ke, whatsoeva while attending dinner. But this year, entah kemaruk apa, I bought myself a night dress, which definitely look good on me (ceh, perasan!) , but will look even better If I could be a lil bit slimmer. (But close your eyes about dua gunung yang terjojol ni, coz mine is not exactly like this one - sopan skeet la...)

I had an eye on a printed roses dress, memang cantik, so girly, girly and penuh sifat2 kewanitaan..cewah...but I don't like one thing about it - it's too short, and I look like completely Chinese baru je tannedkan muka. And a sleeveless dress like that, really make me feel...well I need to think thrice!!

In the mean time, I saw one makcik was arranging Valerie's clothes, and in a blink of eyes, more into my intuition kot....I saw one nice dress, it's a black dress yang memang simple, but sexier, and nicer (sebab labuh sikit dari yang tadi). I didn't think twice, I grabbed the dress, in size 40 (euro) - mak!! besarnya aku!!! - and I felt more confidence exist in me as compared to the previous dress. The price is so much cheaper, macam separuh daripada harga dress tadi, boleh? So, what the hell am I waiting for? Amik...buat tak tau terus bayar je la.

And the next thing to think is, hey camnelah nak cover dress ni plak...isy tak hingin aku pakai berlenging gitu....so I have to think about the outer cover plaks. Rasanya need something that can cover my perut yang cute ni....

The theme for this year is like, "Who You Wanna Be?" - bikin panas je tema cenggini. So I have decided to be MYSELF. My 'revamped' self. Entah, tengokkkan je la... - delly

What The Kerrr!!!

I found this very bad, bad girl. I'm not sure whether she was telling me the truth or not, so to dig more, I need to ask more and to pretend more. Here was the conversation that occured, and me hiding my real name and everything about me. She asked me whether I would like to join her 'gang' - doing stuff like, into bed with men, f**k, take his money and forget. She assured me that I don't have to worry about my safety as they do have 'seniors' who will do checking on him, will spy on him, to make sure he's rich, and easy to play and to be played.

I asked for her phone number, but she said everything is just an online conversation until I finally decide to join their group and meet them personally.

She personified herself as 'Tasha'. Here's the full conversation between us:

natasha23_asha: hye
dellyzz: hello
natasha23_asha: saya tasya 25 fem kl
natasha23_asha: awak asl
dellyzz: delly 20 kl
dellyzz: kl di mana?
natasha23_asha: setapak
natasha23_asha: awak?
dellyzz: kampung baru
dellyzz: kerja di mana?
natasha23_asha: saya duk umah ajer
dellyzz: duduk rumah?
dellyzz: tak kerja?
natasha23_asha: a ah
natasha23_asha: awak keja mana
dellyzz: kl juga
natasha23_asha: oh
dellyzz: chatting ni nak cari boyfriend ke?
natasha23_asha: ko duk kat rumah kampaung ker?
natasha23_asha: saya bukan cari bf
natasha23_asha: bf dah berlambak
dellyzz: tak la, i duduk di condo
dellyzz: ye?
natasha23_asha:
dellyzz: berlambak yekkk
natasha23_asha: ko
dellyzz: tu tak sempat mak cari kerja kan
dellyzz:
natasha23_asha: hehehe
dellyzz: aku dah kawin
natasha23_asha: ko singgle ker
natasha23_asha: dah kahwin
natasha23_asha: umur brp?
dellyzz: 20
natasha23_asha: anak?
dellyzz: 1
natasha23_asha: ni mesti kena tangkap basah lah kan
dellyzz: sesedap mulut kau je
dellyzz:
natasha23_asha: sorrylah
dellyzz: biasalah
natasha23_asha: aku ni nakal sikit
dellyzz: aku nakal jugak, tapi aku tau nak cakap dengan orang macamana
dellyzz: manners la kan
natasha23_asha: oh
natasha23_asha: ko perli tasya yer
natasha23_asha: dellyzz: sorry la tasya, aku jenis cakap straigght
dellyzz: straight
dellyzz: jangan marah ek
natasha23_asha: ok
dellyzz: ko dari mana?
dellyzz: sabah ek/
natasha23_asha: mana husband?
natasha23_asha: taklah aku kl jer
dellyzz: memang orang kl ke apa?
natasha23_asha: a ah
natasha23_asha: ko keja kat mana pulak
dellyzz: kerja kat kl je l
dellyzz: tinggal ngan parents ke/
dellyzz: apsal ko chat ngan pompuan ek, musykil lak aku
dellyzz:
natasha23_asha: a ah
dellyzz: biasanya orang single ni suka chat ngan jantan
natasha23_asha: ye;lah
natasha23_asha: naktanya ko minat tak join geng tasya?
dellyzz: geng apa ko ada?
dellyzz: geng buat apa?
dellyzz: kerja baik ke kerja haram ni?
natasha23_asha: memainkan mamatkaya;
natasha23_asha: ko rasanye?.............
dellyzz: macam best je
dellyzz: camne tu?
dellyzz: woits
dellyzz: dah lari dah?
natasha23 asha: sorry ah dc tadi
dellyzz: takpela
natasha23 asha: so ko line clearker kalau nakjoin kite org?
dellyzz: kerja dia macamana
dellyzz: cubalah explain sket
dellyzz: tak paham la
natasha23 asha: ko keja aper sekarang
dellyzz: kerja biasa aje
dellyzz: sexretary
natasha23 asha: ok
natasha23 asha: kalau join kite org
natasha23 asha: cuma pikat mamat tu then have fun ngan dia supaya buatkan dia percaya kat kite pastu kikid duit
dellyzz: sapa yng kau pernah kikis?
natasha23 asha: banyak org dah
dellyzz: yang popular?
natasha23 asha: kite ader 4 member dalam geng
natasha23 asha: reply cepat leh tak i dah nak kuar kul4 ni
natasha23 asha: tak popular tapi org biasa yg banyak duit
BUZZ!!!
dellyzz: ok
dellyzz: so nak kena main ngan dia ke?
natasha23 asha: mestilah just sekali jer utk buatkan dia org percaya kat kite
natasha23 asha: lepas tu kite mula kikis duit dia org dengan menipu
dellyzz: ala tak nak ahh nak kena main
dellyzz: gila sioootttttt
natasha23 asha: naper?
dellyzz: macamana aku nak tau dia kaya?
natasha23 asha: lor
natasha23 asha: itu ko takyah risau sebab kite ader senior yg akan ushar dulu mamat tu selama 2-3 minggu utk pastikan dia benarbenar kaya.
dellyzz: wahy hebat la persatuan kau ni
natasha23 asha: pastu dia org mainkan mamat tu dulu then pass kat kite org
dellyzz: camana nak mulakan nak cari mamat2 tu?
natasha23 asha: tasya dah 3 bulan join dia org
natasha23 asha: senior kite yg buat keja cari mamat tu
dellyzz: kalau last2 dia tak nak kita
dellyzz: dah pakai pas tu dia lari, camne?
natasha23 asha: kite cuma mainkan mamat 2 then dapat duit bagi komisyen kat senior kite sikit
dellyzz: komisyen berapa banyak?
natasha23 asha: suka hati awaklah
dellyzz: ye ke?
natasha23 asha: sebab setakat ni kite org mainkan mamat ni tak penah ader yg buat cam tu
dellyzz: setakat ni kau dah mainkan berapa banyak jantan? and dah berapa kali kau main?natasha23 asha: kite buka pun aper nak kuar ngan mamat macam tu pun
natasha23 asha: i penah main 5 kali ngan 3 jantan
dellyzz: berapa keuntungan yang kau dapat?
natasha23 asha: setipa sorang i dapat kikis minima 3-4 ribu dalam masa seminggu
natasha23 asha: so i bagi member 3-5 ratus sebab pasang line clear
dellyzz: wow
dellyzz: kaya giler beb
dellyzz: bagi no handphone kau la
dellyzz: nanti aku call
dellyzz: kau dah nak kuar kan?
natasha23 asha: sorrylah awak
natasha23 asha: kite org ni buat keja ni bukan senang nak jaga line
natasha23 asha: mana tahukan ader hantu yg kenakan nanti
natasha23 asha: kalau nak u bagilah no ko
dellyzz: so macamana nak contact kau?
natasha23 asha: kite org cuma online ajer sampai ko serious nak mainkan mamat baru kite ajak jumpa
dellyzz: ooooo, ok
dellyzz: selalu korang jumpa kat mana?
natasha23 asha: aderlah ko jangan risau
natasha23 asha: sorry sulit sampai ko join kite org ok
natasha23 asha: ko pahamlah yer
dellyzz: pahamd
ellyzz: ginilah
dellyzz: aku email kau je la
dellyzz: aku susah sikit
natasha23 asha: ok
dellyzz: sebab aku kan dah kawin
dellyzz: nanti laki aku tau camne?
natasha23 asha: oh
natasha23 asha: husband ko keja jugak ker?
dellyzz: tapi aku minat
dellyzz: nanti aku email kau la
natasha23 asha: janganlah risau ko cuma akan layan mamat tu siang hari ajer
natasha23 asha: ko takder HP ker?
dellyzz: ada
dellyzz: tapi laki aku particular sikit la sesapa yang call aku
dellyzz: tulah pasal
dellyzz: id kau ni alamat email kau jugakkan?
natasha23 asha: jangan risau tasya call during office hour ajer ok
natasha23 asha: a ah sama email
dellyzz: kau selalu online tak?natasha23 asha: selalu gak dari kul 3 ptg sampai 6 ptg
natasha23 asha: awak?
dellyzz: ok aku online esok
dellyzz: kol 3 petang
dellyzz: ok tak?
natasha23 asha: ko hantar offline dulu nanti i online reply ko balik
dellyzz: ok set
natasha23 asha: ko nakjoin ko pilih bangsa tak kalau main mamat tu
dellyzz: mmm
dellyzz: aku suka bangsa afrika
dellyzz:
dellyzz: ok tak?
natasha23 asha: ler afrika kite tak main bahaya
dellyzz: apsal lak?
dellyzz: depa lagi banyak duit beee
natasha23 asha: mana ader member dah try kena tipu
natasha23 asha: kalau indian,chinese ok ker?
dellyzz: ye ke?
dellyzz: mm..indian ok lah
natasha23 asha: sebab dia org yg banyak duit
dellyzz: tapi yang darah punjabi, hensem sket
dellyzz: aku tak naklah yang macam tamil
dellyzz: masakkk!!!!
natasha23 asha: ler pasal duit ko nak memilih lagi
dellyzz: eh ye la
dellyzz: ni demi keselamatan aku
natasha23 asha: susah gak kalau ko memilih
dellyzz: kang hiv kang camne??
natasha23 asha: lor
dellyzz: ok la, ok la
dellyzz: bagi la aku yang nampak hygiene sikit
dellyzz: pembersih
natasha23 asha: kan tasya kata kite ishar dulu sebelum mainkan mamat tu
dellyzz: ok ok
dellyzz: eh tasya aku nak kena pegi ni
dellyzz: laki aku dah nak balik arr
dellyzz: nanti esok aku roger kau
natasha23 asha: ok ko ader gambar tak?
dellyzz: sekarang takde la
dellyzz: nak kena carik dulu
dellyzz: kau datang online la besok kol 3
dellyzz:

Aku dan Kekecewaan

Banyak kali dah bos aku kata, jangan cepat kecewa dan jadilah seorang fighter. Entah apa punya jibauk atau kadul, aku tetap berasa sesuatu di dalam hati. Rasa kecewa. Rasa resah gelisah. Dan rasa sepertimana seorang yang gagal rasa. Aku tak sepatutnya rasa aku gagal dalam ada majalah aku sedang meningkat naik sekarang, tetapi tidak mencapai standard yang boss aku nak. Dan aku berasa amat penat dan letih bekerja dalam penuh tekanan, dan akhirnya terpaksa mengaku bahawa - apa yang aku hasilkan tidaklah sehebat mana.

Perjumpaan hari ni menyaksikan perubahan besar yang berlaku dalam department yang kecil ini, walaupun tidak melibatkan aku dan team aku, tetapi apa yang telah diperbincangkan benar-benar membuatkan aku rasa rendah diri yang teramat. Walaupun aku ada 1001 alasan untuk dikemukakan kenapa majalah ini tak boleh menjadi-jadi macam majalah lain, aku pasti pihak management pun ada 1001 alasan untuk mempertidakkan segala alasan tu. Bukan salah sesiapa, sudah nasib aku terpaksa mengendalikan sebuah majalah yang marketnya agak sukar untuk dipenuhi, walaupun aku tahu kami sedang menuju ke arah itu. Digelar sebagai antara salah satu majaah yang gagal, pastilah membuatkan aku terkilan dan sedih, kerana di sebalik kegagalan tu, akulah yang jadi mentorya. Dan bebudak ni hanya mengikut cakap-cakap aku.

Aku banyak kekurangan, dan aku sedia maklum kekurangan tu ada kuat pada pendirian dan ketegasan juga kekebalan diri aku ni. Aku boleh berjanji untuk lebih aktif, untuk lebih efektif dan bergerak lebih cergas, aku boleh lakukan semuanya dengan sebaik mungkin, malah telah terbukti yang kami telah melakukannya dengan baik sekali sebelum ni. Cuma perlukan sedikit masa lagi dan kepercayaan daripada semua orang.

Cuma ada beberapa bulan untuk membuktikan sesuatu, dan aku hanya mampu berdoa yang sesuatu itu akan terjadi suatu hari nanti...amin..... - delly

Happy Birthday Baby G!

On the 30th of March, it was my G's birthday - the 28th - we both were too busy to celebrate, so I've decided to make everything he wishes come true by today, as today is Friday and the next two days are weekend! I've got some nice plans, but I won't buy him anything, I will ask him what he wants and later buy for him. Somehow talking about taste, me and G are far more gap between us :) So it's better for him to pick up what he wants - just like I chose what I wanted on my birthday and on the Valentine's day.

Next thing - I wish for a nice, soft and cuddly sofa for my home. Ahh....home sweet home....I've got almost everything I want...I've decorated it my way...I just need a sofa to make it grooves..yihaa...and perhaps a book cabinet coz my collection of mags are hell! Hope to buy MP3 player as well coz I've been wanting it since..but I always thought that it'll be a waste of money and too childish. But I love music, and I need to listen to music in whatever I do.

And...I don't know....I'm planning to make a confession on a dance floor..aahh...I've been missing to dance to get freshed, gain more ideas and be ENERGETIC!!

I just read thru a blog from 23 years old girl named "Gadis Berahi" - ha..ha..ha...even though she has stated there that everything written in the blog is her imagination only - but damn, it was a hell creative imagination. Sounds pure, and sincere from the heart. I just wonder how can somebody portrays or imagines something to THATTTTT extent....God' s creation.... :P

I'm having a good day today, peace of mind, I've completed some of my work. I think about 20 percent left before the deadlines.

-delly

Sad News From A Friend

I was doing my job, when all of a sudden I thought of taking a peek at some of my friends' blogs. I went to Su*zie's first, nothing much, all about her work and some weird callers. Kak PNut hasn't update her blogs for more than a week, so I went to her blog, and her story today really surprised me to the knee. I trembled and felt crying because I know how it feels got miscarried. I know she's been waiting and hoping for the second child after Naj*mi, and it ended up like this. I told her that I understand it is not easy to cope up with the fact of life, but that's how life goes...there are always chances in future and I'm sure she will have lots of babies coming all her way...Insya Allah... - delly

W.H.A.T.E.V.E.R!!

Sungguh tak disangka ada makhluk yang faham bahasa Melayu very well kan? And boleh baca the blog lagi. Anyways, people who are not in my list are definitely NOT INVITED to read anything in here at all - and if you still do - I don't really damn care.

There are people out there who don't know anything about me - or at least the new me. I'm very much independent of myself now, well I'm not completely my former self - please la!! I don't give a damn to any other people who try so hard to let me down, I don't recall my history at all - it was all closed long time ago and I'm starting my very new life. I love the life I'm heading now, and I love myself, my family, my baby. I do lots of things that I never got any chances to do before, and I got victory on my own. I don't want to screw up everything now. Because whatever I want in life, in my career, my private life - it's in my hand now.

I don't want to lose G, I don't want to lose my family. We are all ONE. These people if they are gone in my life, I won't bother to look for any replacement - or substitute - because this is the thing that I already promised myself not to. No, I won't. Coz I rather be alone or unmarried my whole life without G. I know how much G and my family love me. And in return, I can't love someone much better than them.

I swear to God that life won't be good for anyone who'd made me fell from my life so deeply, that I had to work so hard to get my life back. God knows how I crawled to this ultimate victory. I've dumped every single moment of my past, not a single history in my mind, just lust and hate. I hate the old me.

I've raised from a fatal, bruised life and I don't allow anyone to take it from me again. - delly

Again...Another News About Us....

Well....another piece of news...of E-Baca...

Young Skateboarders Thrill

THE E-Baca Junior Sk8 Challenge held at Petaling Jaya Municipal Council (MPPJ) Arena Skate Park Square during the one-week school break did not only attract junior skateboarders within the Klang Valley.

About 80 budding skateboarders aged seven to 17 years including several participants from as far as Singapore took part in the one-day competition jointly organised by E-Baca children's magazine and MPPJ.

A participant keeping an eye on his board while executing a move.“We are encouraged by the good turnout. The skateboarders will spread the message on upcoming competitions among themselves. They get along well. We see a lot of potential out there,” said chief judge Johary Fitry Khairuddin, who triumphed at the 2000 X-Rage regional final in Jakarta.

Following another skateboard competition at Terengganu recently, Muhammad Firdaus Abdul Rahman from Singapore met up with his family in Kuala Lumpur.

“I just turned up to support my brothers - Muhammad Feroze, 16, and Muhammad Farris, 12, - who were in action before heading back home together with them.

“We enjoy coming to Malaysia because the facilities for extreme sports here are in good condition. The courses are more challenging, too. Coming here provides us the opportunity to catch up with other skateboarders and meet new skating buddies,” added Firdaus, 18, an engineering student at Republic Polytechnic.

For Farris, who took up skating six years ago, he is now hooked on the sport and has demonstrated his natural flair for the sport especially with his airborne tricks.
Meanwhile, Feroze is just a social skater.

“We get to pick up technical skills from the Malaysian skaters during the competitions here,” said Farris, who came in fifth at the challenge.

The siblings' father Abdul Rahman Abdul Ghani also accompanied them for the competition.
“It is a rare opportunity for the youngsters to compete in junior competitions. As the sport is beginning to grow in Malaysia, I am impressed that a lot of activities are organised for budding skateboarders,” said Abdul Rahman, who also brought his youngest son Farouq, seven.

“My children are passionate about skateboarding. They have been showing good progress. Although it cost a bit to sustain their interest in the sport, I am just providing them with the necessary support for them to fulfil their potentials.”

Abdul Rahman also makes it a point to allow his children to take part in competitions outside the republic to expose them to different competitive environments.

Mohd Zamri Mohd Ramli, who was one of the two judges, said the skaters took keen interest in perfecting their moves at the park on the eve of the event.

An official (right) briefing the participants before the competition started.“Our aim is to keep the skateboarding scene alive in Petaling Jaya. We are pleased that new faces that are coming through,” said Mohd Zamri, adding that at least 20 youngsters will gather at MPPJ Arena Skate Park Square every day to execute skateboarding, in-line skating, and BMX riding stunts.

The participants were judged based on their consistency, difficulty, run and style.
They were given one minute to flaunt their tricks on the course tackling the obstacles such as fun box, starter box, quarter pipe, spine box, jump box, bank ramp, mini ramp and pyramid hip.

A total of RM1,250 prize money sponsored by MPPJ was on offer to the top five winners.
At the end, Muhammad Izzharfan Mohd Azrain emerged as champion and pocketed RM500 for his effort.

Mohamad Mohd Nizan in second and Ahmad Aizat Ahmad Ariffin in third took home RM300 and RM200, respectively. Fourth-placed Mohamad Fikri Fauzi took RM150 while Farris in fifth took home RM100.

The sponsors included X-Fresh FM, Yeo's Justea, Wild Channel, Prostar, Huyo skateboard, Nestlé Koko Krunch, Tesco, Eau Claire Mineral Water, Sprite Remix, Bangsar shopping centre, Kids Scuba, Rosli catering and Tanjung Bidara Beach Resort.

News From www.skatemalaysia.com

(As quoted from www.skatemalaysia.com)

E-Baca Junior Skate Comp Results!!!

15th March 2006, Arena PJ skatepark, Petaling Jaya
The park today is full with kids (i mean real kids) practising their skills to perform for their best run during the competition. There are 80 contestant all over and mostly were in between age of 9 to 17. We (Myself, my wife Hanim, my son Anaqi and 3 of my nephews which is also junior skateboaders) arrived there a bit late today and my son didn't get the chance to compete as the registration are already full. I was informed that they only limit it for 80 contestant. Oh well, maybe next time Anaqi!!!

The event starts about 10.30am and the weather is a bit HOT!!! There are 8 heats overall. Each heats consist of 10 competitors with 1 run each. They were given 60 seconds per run and only the 10 best run contestant will be selected to compete in the final. On that day itself, there are also contestant comes all the way from Japan, Hawaii, Singapore and United States. This is a good sign to the local skateboard scene. I'm shocked to hear it. Besides, I can see who's the best that day. I'd already know who will selected into the final. It's not as hard as judging a pro contest. Anyway, where are the others skateboard media (3X, Revo, etc)?

12.45pm, break time and headed for lunch at "medan selera" near by. Comp starts again at 2pm and still there's 3 or 4 heats to go. Luckyly the event was sponsored by Nestle, Yeo's and Sprite with giving away free Coco Crunch; Honey Star; Yeo's Justea (only for contestant); Sprite Remix (also for contestant) and mineral water for everyone. They also giving away food (Nasi Goreng Cina lauk Ayam rempah) and more.

MC for the day was Boy PJ and at the same time Judging. Joe Ipoh being the head judge. As for the rest like Sani, Botak, Pojie, Mat Dagu, and Zam were there as part of the crew as the starter and checkers. While Nan from Interactive X as the DJ. What a big arena PJ family.... The crowd is not that bad as i expected. Well, what do you expect from an event held during the school holiday on Tuesday?Finally (at last 3X and Revo just arrived), they had announced the 10 finalist name; plus 5 extra name added into the final list.

These 5 were specially selected by the event organiser itselves. The best 15 finalist were consist of 5 PJ wellknown skaters (selalu training kat arena), 2 Terengganu skaters (Dirty Skate team), Wan Kenit from Teluk Intan, Faris (Singapore), Koyo (Japan) and others. Before the final round start. A huge bus from XFresh arrived in the arena. The bus had a lounge inside with a stage on top of the bus. There were few artist and group performed on that day. Ruffedge were the main guest artist. I didn't know it untill Cat Ruffedge (an old Ipoh skate friend) called me while shooting the final round scene. Glad to see you pal!

Keiron Brodie was also in the event covered for 8TV. Ok back to the final round. This time they give 2 run each. The PJ Boy; whom i'd assumed skate really good that day might win it coz most of them did try all the obstacles and most of them did almost a perfect run. I think Gaban did a perfect run in his 2nd round. But among these big fellow kids. The main attraction in this competition were these 3 small young boys; Faris (Singapore), Koyo (Japan) and Wan Kenit (Teluk Intan).

Koyo had a bad run in the final as he had to used somebody else board (his previous board lose one wheel nuts). Pitty for him but Wan Kenit did better. He did a kickflip on the ramp, almost land the FS boarslide on the funbox, did drop in the huge ramp and ran over the jump ramp with a backside ollie nose grab (land and fall). He looks pretty tired in the final but he is ok. Next was Faris; my personal favourites. First time seein' this kid back in the 2001 Phillips X-Rage. He has grown and improves a lot. He did a great in most run. The most memorable trick of the day was the BMX trick superman. This is the first time i've seen a skaters did in on a skateboard. He also did a big dare to fall bomb drop from the platform wall deck into the ramp. Damn...that was RAD!!! Love that kid... i wish my son could be like him someday.

Well, we didn't stay for the prize giving ceremony as we notice the first water drops from the sky. So we left and below is the results. Anyway, a big thumbs up to karangkraf team and crew for this rare event. Also not to forget to all Arena PJ staff and crew. Hope to see it more again next time. Congratulations to all the winners!!!

Results: Skateboard Junior 1st - Gaban2nd - Arin3rd - Aizat4th - Fikri5th - Faris (Singapore)
Pic: (L-R) Koyo - drop in, Daniel - jammin' with the contestant, Koyo - Manual, Faris - superman, Gaban - boardslide.

(All photos and text by Boy Ipoh of www.skatemalaysia.com)

*Note: They have some good pix too of the event, but at about the same quality of ours.

Kuala Lumpur International Book Fair

After one year. Another episode of mouth-fighting with each other. (Sigh....) But it is actually good to see kids come running to your booth and start shouting, "Mama!!! That's E-Ba*ca!!!" Or mothers, fathers, sisters or brothers, or even teachers who come slowly behind me and start asking, "Where's the latest E-Ba*ca?".That's cool. Pretty cool...and I LIKE!. It's just that I don't fancy doing things like "E-Baca satu ringgit...E-Baca satu ringgit!!!!" so loudly, I mean (damn loudly) so that everybody can just listen and be quiet to give the way to you. By nature, I'm really a quiet person, but not until I meet up those species who have such senses of humour (my style) - like old buddies - Budaiy, Angah, Syaz, Boje, Ina KRU - or Azno*r andLin*da's kind of. Or even Suzi*e's.

Anyways, it's okay, of course I'm being dedicated to my magazine, and I really appreciate An*i who came up to help me, even though she was a bit late. I feel disappointed of the other two, but just need to be understanding. Nak buat macamana....I gave them a chance to work and get a free leave by working today or tomorrow, but they seem not interested, because only one thing - I can always 'kow team' with them anytime by anyways. It's okay. They don't even call me to tell or ask me at least, "Hey, what's up there?". No, not everybody can be like me, I swear to God.

I felt a lil bit jealous when everybody with their team was there, and was selling their own magazine. So sepakat. When I looked up to myself, I just felt so bad that I had to stand there alone, like a "kadol" (as An*i told me the meaning last time - berseorangan di tepi-tepian buku-bukuan" - and sadly the "kadol" was me), where else my very rival - every one of their member was busy shouting and shouting and shouting. And I kept looking at myself and started to think - what the hell am I doing here by myself - from 11 to 4.30 pm?

I should not say anything about it, and I am not supposedly hope that everyone saw my presence there and would give their report to the upper management about me being there. No, it is not about it - at all. It is about commitment - and for me to realize how many people actually are exposed to that magazine - I think the answer is disappointing me, but that's the thing I need to face up.

I need to be close to the readers - that's about it - and the next planning is about to have any get-together or gathering with the readers. I managed to handle a very big event and collected bundles of skate lovers at one lace - and why not bring bundles of E-Ba*ca's readers to Sunway Lagoon and mandi mandi, bersukaria ha..ha..ha...alamak...use your brain la Budell!!

TBCed..... -delly

Buat Apa Yang Tak Penat?

Dulu aku macam tertanya-tanya jugak macamana rasanya mengorganize sesatu event, ialah macam BK selalu buat ataupun macam Media Hibur*an selalu buat, dan macam majalah-majalah lain jugak. Rupa-rupanya, memang - tak tipu kerat jari punyalah - penat giles! Penatnya tak mampu aku nak gambarkan dengan kata-kata, yang aku tahu aku ultrapenat bila period aku tetiba je datang cepat terlampau berbanding schedule biasa. Kes ni berlaku sama masa aku stress nak buat Shah Alam Jurnalis dengan Su*zie dulu. Gila! Memang lepas je event tu aku dah menghabiskan masa aku tidur dan tidur dengan jayanya! Yang pastinya, aku suka, dan semua orang gembira bila Tuan Haji dan anaknya sangat suka dengan event tu. Dan paling best, lebih banyak kenalan (which means lebih banyak contact) untuk event-event yang akan datang.

Sampai sekarang, maksud aku sekarang dan selepas ini aku terpaksa meligatkan kepala berfikir apakah event seterusnya yang akan majalah aku buat lagi. Jun dengan Disember tahun ni bakal menjadi sasaran sebab cuti sekolah yang panjang.

Tumpang gembira juga bila G telah mendapatkan notebook yang baru untuk dirinya. Merasa gak aku duduk kat Starbucks sambil access Internet. Hampeh punya awek!

Alamak, can't work extra hours today...gtg...... - delly

P/S: Aku dapat sms yang memang tak disangka-sangka, si si*alan itu kata: "Tolong call i. I masih sygkan u" - siap boleh buat singkatan "syg" lagi...wek!!! wek!!!!!! wekk!!!!!! Aku nak muntah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Real Skateboarders

Pictures speak louder than words. E-Baca Junior Sk8 Challenge.

Good Job!

We've been waiting for the days so patiently, Alhamdulillah, the final day was the bomb yesterday! Everybody presented the best in them, thank you so much for my crew members: Ani, CK, Ida, Cat, Jai, Karen, Ai Pheng, Cha, Botak, Nani, Siti Ram....and my media friends who supported us, Kosmo, Metro, Utusan, The Star, 8TV and TV3 - not forgotten Nadiah from X-Fresh fm, who brought the Xplorer bus, and the artistes performed from the bus roof top! Dr Fazley came for half an hour to support us, that was wonderful too.

On the first day (14th), I was totally surprised of the participation list as showed by MPPJ. At first I thought we would be acting chin in hands waiting for the participants. But what actually happened was reversed - they waited for us. And on the 15th, to the extent, I had to refuse a few applications to join. Really, it was great. And it won't be successful without these people - including myself who was totally busy on phone, and in the event I was here and there entertaining people. My bosses came to see the event, thank God, they were impressed by the sponsors.

Pictures are still in the processing, well only pix worth thousand words! - delly.....

My Baby and Me

We are back to normal, I love him so much. No, we can't be separated, not now, not tomorrow and forever. He came to visit me when I thought everything was over, he was right, when we were lonely, we'll be thinking of someone who loves us so much. I do. I love him. My love is so strong that I can bet, somebody who loves me back has a very strong will towards me. I'm not a witch. But I know. Just know.
Last week, (the closing of the quarelling), I got two tickets to Z**k for the launching of Levi's Reengineered Jeans (thank you Che' A*h). Damn, I got lotta fun with G. I was in stress of the event, of my mag, so I was enjoying so much.

I LIKE!!! - delly.....

Heartbroken

"G, u r freed now. Out of this suffering. I'm a woman with no luck in love. I don't regret I met u and what we've been thru. It was the best thing ever happened in my life. I love you all my heart. But there'll be a woman who gonna love you more. Sorry for all promises made. I swear to God no one after you. I'll be single my whole life coz ths love is so into me. But for your sake, I have to let it go. Goodbye O**...goodbye love. Regards, delly"

This is how I end my love story. My last sms to G, with pray and hope he'll find someone who suits him. Someone who understands him more than I do. And more than everything, someone who will love him with all her heart like I did before. Well for me it is none of our fault that it ends this way, it is just that I don't want to be treated like this again and I don't want to suffer him with something that definitely can't change inside me. I don't want my work, my job to be a reason for us to stay apart, and later to fight about it. I'm done. I can't deny, I love him so much even till now, and forever, because when I was with him, I felt love, I really felt somebody took care of me so much. Our story can never be the same story like what I've been thru before coz it was lust, not love. I don't know about him coz I heard the former love was the best. It should be that way coz that time he was rich, he could fly over to her country and vice versa.

I don't hope for anything. For a normal fight, even the abnormal ones, I will always to be the first to pick up the phone and start calling. I always cried and admitted my faults. He admitted too sometimes but the thing is, this relationship is getting worse with the concept of not trusting each other. He wanted to know every single of my activity while I had no rights to peek anything on his side. He could check on my phone, my every contact, my every sms, but me, I coulnd't even touch the phone. I don't even know how the operating system of his phone at all.

I'm not looking for reasons. There are bundles of reasons that we always seek in searching somebody's weakness. Well I have my own weaknesses. And there are many that made G hated me so much sometimes. I don't want anybody to even hate me again. Coz I am the happiest person in my office and I won't definitely mix bull**it personal stuff with my work. I handled myself so well when my family broke my engagement. I don't know how it is going to be with this one, coz this was my very very love, I just don't know....I just have to let him go because I don't want to hate me for more.

If he's reading my blog, or if he ever came across my blog, I just want him to know that:

"I still love you. And I really do. Because of this love, I don't want you to get hurt, or even hurt me. You deserve someone so much better".

Love,
delly

"Berkobar-Kobar" vs "Berdebar-Debar"

Dua perkara, berdebar-debar dan berkobar-kobar. Itulah perasaan yang telah aku alami sekarang dan bakal mengalami yang lebih teruk lagi bermula minggu ni. E-Baca Junior Sk8 Challenge, aku dah dengar promosinya di mana-mana. Dalam X-Fresh, beberapa buah majalah terbitan company aku, termasuk majalah aku sendiri, website X-Fresh, website aku dan bakal dalam website company. Minggu lepas betul-betul minggu tekanan - bikin aku 100 peratus panasaran. Ada je yang berlaku. Cool Element tarik diri, makanan A1 pun tarik diri. Aku yakin aku tak sepatutnya rasa takut langsung dengan apa yang berlaku.

Jadi bila aku balik office, aku tarik nafas panjang-panjang, dan start concentrating dengan apa yang tak settle. Walaupun ada banyak replies yang mendukacitakan, termasuk daripada Nick dan Disney's Channel, tapi, buat biasa ajelah. Hari Jumaat aku siap boleh ikut I*da ngan Kak Fi*za buat make over lagi. Lantaklah. Aku dalam tekanan. Dalam pada seronok belajar make up pun, ada je call menambah semakkan pemikiran aku. Termasuklah yang nak cancel appointment. Suka hati korang. Makin dekat event ni, walaupun stressnya makin melampau, tapi aku mesti tenang. Yang pasti, Jumaat ari tu buat aku tersenyum dengan hadiah perfume sebuah. Jadilah. Pun aku tak mampu nak senyum sepanjang ari di office sebab jejak je kaki ke pintu office, berlambak-lambak perkara yang duz-daz-dap-auch! masuk dalam kepala otak. Relax.....

Baru nak keluar daripada pintu office pukul 6 lebih, satu lagi kejutan. Ayam A1 ni memang banyak main, memang bikin hati panas. Aku paling 'bengkek' dengan AE yang pandai-pandai bagi jaminan yang depa dah 70 percent agreed lah (kononnya!) untuk event ni. Aku ngan I*da mati-matilah percaya. Siap nak itenary lengkap kitorang lagi. What the! Aku sampai pecah kepala nak fikir slot mana dia nak masuk. Last-last macam tu pembalasannya, dengan alasan boss dia gi overseas. WTF!

Balik kampung hari Sabtu ari tu, sepanjang perjalanan kepala aku ligat fikir macamana nak settle soal makanan ni. Aku ada niat nak mintak bapak aku sponsor je, dia memang takde hal punyer. Tapi tetiba masa tengah makan sebelum balik tadik bapak aku bagi idea baik punyer. Dia called Pak Ngah aku kat UKM, orang tua tu setuju. Alahai...Alhamdulillah...leganya! Walaupun dulu aku adalah tragedi berkecik hati dengan dia, (tapi aku dah lupalah semuanya), aku bersyukur dengan persetujuan dia. Terus aku sms I*da cakap jangan risau yang makanan dah under cover. Settled.

Dah dua tiga kali aku dengar promo E-Baca dalam X fresh, memang rasa senang hati sangat, harap-harap semuanya akan ebrjaya..... - delly

Keep On Hoping and Hoping and Hoping...and....

Yesterday everybody in office was eager to know only one thing - the new scheme. How it will be like, how much increment, how much allowance..bla..bla...bla...and the editors were among those who kept checking on the salary slips to come from as early in the morning, and finally, after being sooooo patient, we got to know everything by 5 pm. Thank God!

More sighs than relieves, some said it is not as said, as told and definitely as expected. Some said, syukur, Alhamdulillah..rezeki. And me....I fall into the second category because I just love the new scheme, I'm sure I'm being paid as according to my job specs, and I'm so grateful. I mean, come onla, belajar daripada pengalaman, bersyukur dengan kehidupan baru daripada kehidupan silam. I've been thru experiences of not been paid, pas tu they deducted my EPF but when I checked up on it, tak masuk pun dalam EPF. Kena kerah tenaga kerja sampai pagi, ended up, tipu kata nak bayar tak bayar.

At least kat sini, whatever they've promised, they make it come true. All the office political issues are common anywhere, any parts of the world, and it shouldn't be 'onar' in my life. Aku orang kecil, pangkat kecil, yang bercita-cita besar dan ada banyak impian yang ingin dicapai. I shouldn't bother and be bothered of any rubbish talk for more and start concentrating on my career. - delly